Sunday, July 24, 2011

Thumbs Down!

So far in my travels around the Atlanta food and nightlife scene, there have only been two places that have blown my mind at just how ridiculous they are. And not in a good way. There are upsides to these places, to be sure, but I really would not recommend them to anyone.

The first is the Mellow Mushroom in Brookhaven. Now, to be fair, I absolutely love Mellow Mushroom. Not only do that have fantastic food, but they have a pretty awesome beer club that you can join (“It’s like a book club! But with no books. And beer!) and I have spent many an evening with friends at these establishments. The location in Brookhaven, however, is a waste of your life. I went with a friend and after letting the seating hostess know that were choosing to sit outside were completely ignored for literally twenty minutes. They weren’t particularly busy that evening, there were plenty of open tables, and servers were in our section. We tried to flag one down but no one felt the need to even take our drink order. At first I thought this was a one off kind of thing, but three other people I know have had the exact same experience at this one. Which is really a shame, because I would have loved their tempeh sandwich and a good IPA. Other Mellow Mushroom locations are definitely a go, but give Brookhaven a wide berth.

The second on the list is the Graveyard Tavern in the East Atlanta Village. I’ll come right out and say that I have a soft spot for hipster bars. I grew up in Athens so there was really no avoiding them. People watching at these establishments is always hilarious and once people start dancing it just gets better. When I was there last night they were still serving food, so once we finally got seated (first the hostess put us at a table with an elderly gentleman we didn’t know… we grabbed the first booth next to us that opened up) our waitress was all kinds of slow and the tv’s all over the bar were playing Silent Hill. Do you know how difficult it is to enjoy a conversation and a Victory Golden Monkey while Triangle Head is ripping people apart right next to your head? And then once the DJ started up, the giant projector screen behind them was playing this bizarre, old-school basically snuff porn thing? I don’t even know. But there were way too many naked people chopping limbs off of each other and drinking blood to enjoy my dancing experience to the fullest. I understand the hipster appeal of really terrible movies, but I’m way ready to not be bombarded with things like that when I really just want to have a night out. There are definitely good things about Graveyard, but everything else so overshadowed them that while my friend and I were dancing he literally said we should go home and watch BBC Sherlock instead of staying longer. So we did.

I’ll keep everyone posted on where I’m going next, but I would really suggest you don’t play at either of these places if you want good service or to save your eyes some trauma.

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Smirnoff Popsicles

Good evening, Atlanta! Let’s talk about a way to beat this nasty heat. Though to begin, I’d like to apologize for the terrible lapse in postings as of late. I’ve been moving into a new place in the city and that sordid business really takes over your life. But enough of that. Moving any amount of furniture up a set of outside stairs in the middle of a Georgia summer is an absolutely miserable experience. A similarly unpleasant occurrence is having too small of an amount of anything left in a bottle to do something worthwhile with! Now, I would generally just finish it off (in this case the ‘it’ in question is the very bottom of a bottle of Smirnoff Cosmopolitan – not mine, I swear I bought it for a friend!) but there were far greater moments of brilliance to be had today than just finishing it up!

With the temperature steadily climbing up to and past a hundred degrees in the middle of the city, there are many tasty treats that can be made. My particular snack of choice today will be a cranberry apple Cosmo popsicle. All I did was mix the dregs of the bottle with some crystal light and we’re going to be good to go. They should be done freezing in just a bit and I will be more than happy to sample them. I think this will be quite an excellent experiment, there will be more creative endeavors in the near future so I’ll be sure to keep you posted. I would love something frozen with whiskey in it, that is definitely next on the list. As for now, stay inside!